ok. case solved. my mistake from the beginning...

i ran the adafruit test sketch without the reset lines, and after the guy in their forum reminded me, i tried this inside void setup, and than i realized that the rfm69 initializes before void setup, so i inserted these lines inside MyTransport.cpp:

void stInitTransition(void)
{
	pinMode(9, OUTPUT); //adafruit rfm69hcw board fix
     digitalWrite(9, HIGH);
     delay(100);
     digitalWrite(9, LOW);
     delay(100);
     TRANSPORT_DEBUG(PSTR("TSM:INIT\n"));
	// initialise status variables
	_transportSM.pingActive = false;
	_transportSM.transportActive = false;
	_transportSM.lastUplinkCheck = 0ul;

and everything is fine.
now i have a running serial-gw and 3 nodes that one of them talks to the gateway directly from a distance which a similar nrf node needed 2 repeaters to do so. exciting! its about 117 meters of direct line, with one plastic transperant door between and only simple standing wire antenna without dipole.

thanks everyone,

and a letter to the honorable @Admin (s):
may i propose a sticky thread dedicated to all compatible hardwares which need special configuration in order to work with mysensors. some examples:
this thread
adafruit feather
w5100 with rfm69

i think many members will benefit from such thread for saving time sweat and unnecessary effort for something that should be written somewhere in some dust covered manual

@Yveaux well, this topic started when i want to check my system and i see red bars in domoticz, so if domoticz doesnt show at all, i know the controller is down and for this issue youre right i dont have any solution right now (maybe a node with relay to repower the Rpi? ) and this is a rare situation.

now after digging in the forum and upgrading nodes and repeaters with seperate power, decaps and tinfoil wrap, i still get sometimes hangouts which magically dissappear after pulling the plug and reinserting it. cant explain why but thats always work. unless a repeater is down...

now - a non repsonisve sensor - you mean like DHT? so i'll see there is abnormal reading - e.g. high temp at night - and this wont trigger the reset because the connection is fine.

non responsive radio - if thats the point after the reset upgrade - thats also a rare situation, and i'll replace it.

non responsive GW - i'll see too much nodes not reconnecting, also rare, but more easy to discover and debug.
non repsonsive controller - also rare and discoverable quickly.

now, i dont think there is any downside of resetting a node - well a hw_reboot seem to stuck an arduino... - and resending the find parent procedure from time to time wont flood the network . or im wrong?

@sundberg84 well about the response time, i think there is a delay but it is still good to recieve it within the time i define as critical for a node to lose connection e.g. 30 minutes or so.

the problem is, if a temp node is sending its data without any problem for a long time but there is only problem in recieving the ping from the GW - GW busy, repeaters too busy, or the fact that every node sends time requests flood the network and cause data to dissapear - NOW THAT CAN MAKE THING WORSE....

currently i dont have any controllable nodes so my gw dosent send any data to any node - only recieving so all the data goes in one direction.

i'll test and see.

Happy Hannuka!!
as my network is used at my work, and im looking for commercial alternatives because of the connection failures issue im struggling to overcome(like in this post), reading this thread woke up the urge to finally esatblish my own home network, so i sat now and reinstalled domoticz and registered my first node - for controlling my living room blind!! at last after year from the arrival of the order from aliexepress...

thank you all guys, learnt a lot from you and other forum members.

good night!

@sundberg84

well, another week has passed and i think im after it.
the problematic node recieved a new case to hold the itead nano-io-shield which acts as a dc-dc converter - gives the nrf power from the 7-12v pass the arduino, and also i gave it a 10mf cap.
its so different to open the browser day after day without seeing any red bars...

thanks a lot

@tboha
The picture you referred to shows the rfm69HW from my sensors page and the adafruit is rfm69Hcw that's why they're don't identical.

And I've tried also without capacitor.
Tomorrow I'll check the EN. Maybe I'll wire it and write it high or whatever needed.
Thanks a lot

ok. case solved. my mistake from the beginning...

i ran the adafruit test sketch without the reset lines, and after the guy in their forum reminded me, i tried this inside void setup, and than i realized that the rfm69 initializes before void setup, so i inserted these lines inside MyTransport.cpp:

void stInitTransition(void)
{
	pinMode(9, OUTPUT); //adafruit rfm69hcw board fix
     digitalWrite(9, HIGH);
     delay(100);
     digitalWrite(9, LOW);
     delay(100);
     TRANSPORT_DEBUG(PSTR("TSM:INIT\n"));
	// initialise status variables
	_transportSM.pingActive = false;
	_transportSM.transportActive = false;
	_transportSM.lastUplinkCheck = 0ul;

and everything is fine.
now i have a running serial-gw and 3 nodes that one of them talks to the gateway directly from a distance which a similar nrf node needed 2 repeaters to do so. exciting! its about 117 meters of direct line, with one plastic transperant door between and only simple standing wire antenna without dipole.

thanks everyone,

and a letter to the honorable @Admin (s):
may i propose a sticky thread dedicated to all compatible hardwares which need special configuration in order to work with mysensors. some examples:
this thread
adafruit feather
w5100 with rfm69

i think many members will benefit from such thread for saving time sweat and unnecessary effort for something that should be written somewhere in some dust covered manual

@Tris
ok it didnt work with the w5100.h amendment, so i reverted to the original config.
now im on your new pinout with the a0-a2 thing, and i got identification on domoticz log and ping throught win7 command line. everything looks fine, but when i try mockmysensors to see if it recieves any comminication i dont see anything.
also the serial log looks wierd:

IP: 192.168.254.204
0;255;3;0;9;MCO:BGN:STP
0;255;3;0;9;MCO:BGN:INIT OK,TSP=1
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: connect
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: 0;0;3;0;2;
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: 0;0;3;0;2;Get Version
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: 0;0;3;0;18;PING
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: 0;0;3;0;18;PING
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: 0;0;3;0;18;PING
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: 0;0;3;0;18;PING
0;255;3;0;9;Eth: 0;0;3;0;18;PING

and it goes on and on...
of course both nodes have gone eeprom clearing

@Tris thanks a lot. I'll check it on Sunday.

Btw i use adafruit rfm69hw breakout so no level shifter needed, but i need to post my fix for it because it needs my transport.h mod

@Tris with or without w5100. H mod?

@Jonathan-Caes @Frédéric-Grandjean
if i use w5100 shield on uno - so i cant connect the pins how i want - means w5100 cs stays on pin 10.
what should i do?

@tekka

Tried this on d9 inside the void setup:

pinMode(9, OUTPUT);
  digitalWrite(9, HIGH);
  delay(100);
  digitalWrite(9, LOW);
  delay(100);

The adafruit test sketch put this in order to reset the board in the setup phase.
Didn't work

@tboha
Maybe library issue.?
I checked the same sketch with nrf24 and it was fine

@tboha
checked now.
D13 shows 0v (measuring on the uno itself) and after some seconds, when it lits up forever it shows 0.3v and the serial output prints these two new lines:

0;255;3;0;9;TSM:FAIL:RE-INIT
0;255;3;0;9;TSM:INIT

also , about the VIN discussion, why does mysensors advice to connect 5v to 3,3v regulator to VIN? on the connect the radio page

about more boards - i only have these 5 adafruit breakouts. all other nodes and GW are working on nrf24. so nothing to compare. and all 5 do the same error

@tboha
stripped the CAP
tried this with EN pin: (connected to D7)

void setup()
{
  pinMode(7, OUTPUT);
  digitalWrite(7, LOW);
  delay(500);
  digitalWrite(7, HIGH);
	// Setup locally attached sensors
}

nothing..
and ther is a steady 4.4v on EN (checking from EN to GND

what does the steady 13 led light means?

@tboha
The picture you referred to shows the rfm69HW from my sensors page and the adafruit is rfm69Hcw that's why they're don't identical.

And I've tried also without capacitor.
Tomorrow I'll check the EN. Maybe I'll wire it and write it high or whatever needed.
Thanks a lot